Episode eighteen: what's Next?

Hafsat ta tsaya saroro tana kallona. Sannan ta sunkuyo saitin fuskata tace "yanzu ke Moon kina ganin har kinyi girman da zaki fara soyayya? Har kina ganin kin isa ki yanke wa kanki hukunci? Har kina ganin kin san menene dai dai menene ba dai dai ba?" I was ready for her dan haka ko gezau banyi ba nace "7 years ago, sanda nace inna girma ina so in zama neorosurgeon murna kuka yi ta tayani kuna cewa nayi making right decision, ta yaya kuma yanzu zaki ce min ban isa in making decisions ba? I know what I am doing I just need u to support me please" Tayi min wani kallon wulakanci tace "lallai yau na tabbatar baki da hankali Moon" tayi tafiyar ta ta zauna. Nayi shiru ina tunani, lallai Hafsat bata gama sanina ba har yau.
Mutane da yawa suna cewa I am a genius, amma ni ban yarda ba, na san dai ina da brains kuma I am going to use it here. Tabbas nasan ina son Ibrahim amma hakan bazai sa in barshi yayi meddling with my life ba. Dole zanyi mana katanga tsakani na dashi. I said yes to him saboda bana son ya bar makarantar kamar yadda yayi threatening amma hakan ba yana nufin I will let him romance me ba. In dai har yana sona zai jira ni har in gama sec sch sannan we will see what will happen.

Na gama tsara komai yadda nake so ya kasance. Abu na farko shine; ba zan ke bari muna kebewa ni da shi ba alone. Dan haka ana yin break na tashi a class nayi announcing cewa ina gayyatar duk wanda yake da ra'ayi zamu ke karatu tare. Kusan rabin class din suka ce suna so, nan muka zauna muka tsara timetable ta karatu, kullum da akwai subject din da zamukeyi, za muke fara wa 3pm mu gama 6pm. Nayi inviting duk class din ne saboda nasan kullum dole wani zai zo, baza mu kasance daga ni sai Ibrahim ba.
Abu na biyu da nayi shine na fito da duk textbooks dina na jefa akan desk dina yadda babu yadda za'ayi mutun ya zauna akai, no more sitting on the desk tactic. Iyakacin sa sai dai ya tsaya a gaban board ya gama abinsa ya fita. The next thing da nayi shine ana tashi a school na tafi gurin HOD na Islamic studies na kai masa complain cewa ina so a raba mana class din islamiyya ni da Hafsat, ina so a mayar dani B class. Da kyar na samu ya amince shima saboda muna mutunci dashi sosai tun jss1. Nasan in Ibrahim ya fahimci abinda nayi he will be mad but I am ready for him.

Ai kuwa sanda ya fahinci na chanja class a islamiyya he was furious. Muna zaune muna karatu a new class dina sai gashi ya shigo ya bawa yasaiyadin mu hannu suka gaisa sannan yace "I will like to see one of your students please" nasan ni yake nema amma sai naki dago kaina na dukufa ina karatu, ya sayyadin yace masa "kadan yi hakuri in ba emmergency bane yanzu muna karatu in mungama sai tazo" Ibrahim yayi masa godiya ya fita. Sai da naga saura less than ten minutes mu tashi kuma na riga na biya karatu na sai na tambayi yasayyadi nace zan je toilet, yace min ai it is almost time inna tafi inyi zamana kawai, dama haka nake so dan haka na dauki books dina sai hostel. Hafsat tana zuwa ta fara tuhumata akan menene yasa na chanja class nace mata its none of her business.
Ranar da Ibrahim yazo mana maths yaga na cika gaba na da texbooks, kawai ya tsaya yana kallona ni kuwa na dauke kaina kamar ban san yana yi ba. Duk yadda yaso in kula shi naki yarda har period dinsa ta fita, yazo ya tsaya a gabana yace "see me immediately after school" nace "yes sir" amma ko kadan banyi niyyar zuwa ba. Da yamma muka shirya wajan mu biyar muka fita karatu. Muna zuwa muka yi arranging chairs muka samo wani babban table muka saka, mun fara karatu kenan sai ga wasu ma sunzo, haka muka hadu wajan mu goma, muka shiga library muka karbo aron books da syllabus din term din muna tsara yadda zamu fara karatun sai ga Ibrahim. Tsayawa yayi yana kallon mu fuskarsa cike da mamaki. Yayi kwalliyarsa da sabuwar shadda sai, kamshi yake yi. Ya jingina da jikin library ya rungume hannayensa a kirjinsa ya zubo min ido, kallo daya nayi masa na dauke kai naci gaba da abinda nake yi. Amira ta taba ni tace "mutumin ki fa ke yake nema" nace mata "I know" na cigaba da karatu na, can ta sake cewa "duk wannan kwalliyar fa ke akayi wa" na sake ce wa "I know" taga dai bani da niyyar kulata ta rabu dani, ita Amira bata san zafin da nakeji a raina ba, I missed him alot amma still I want to be strong, na leka ta saman littafina ina kallon shi naga ya dauko wayar sa yana dannawa, nan na samu damar kare masa kallo. Sabuwar shaddar sa kalar ash mai haske ta sha dinkin tazarce da aiki kalar ash mai duhu, hular sa da takalmin sa duk ash mai duhu ne, fatar sa tayi tas. Ina kallonsa kawai sai tsintar ido na nayi acikin nasa, nayi sauri na dauke kaina. Sai kuma ya taso ya karaso inda muke, ina jinsa yana tsokanar Hafsat wai taje gida ta kara kiba, ga mamaki na sai naji ta kulashi tace shima yaje gida ya kara fari, ya dawo kusa da Amira yace mai ta kawo masa daga gida. Kusan saida yayi wa kowa magana a gurin amma banda ni, nima kuma bance masa komai ba.
Washegari muna cikin class sai gashi yazo yace da teacher din mu zai karbi sako a guri na. Ina jin haka nayi sauri nace "I gave Mr Victor to give to you" ya tsaya yana kallona, ni dashi duk munsan babu wani sako da zai karba a gurina, can yace "OK thanks" ya fita fuskarsa babu alamar annashuwa. Ranar da daddare muna zuwa islamiyya naga 'yan A class suna komawa hostel, na tambayi dalili sai suka ce yasayyadinsu yace baya jin dadi bazai samu damar zuwa ba.
Kusan 3 weeks muna haka da Ibrahim, he was so frustrated nima haka, har na fara tunanin anya zan iya kuwa? I am not as strong as I thought I was. San da mukayi wata daya daddy yazo mana visiting tare da yaya Walid, naji dadin visit dinsu saboda I was in need of little love, kuma na samu sosai a gurin daddy, mun dade muna hira kafin su tafi. A ranar da daddare bayan mun tashi daga islamiyya sai yasaiyadin mu tsayar dani akan maganar saukar mu, by the time da muka gama magana dashi almost kowa ya tafi, shima yana fitowa yayi tafiyarsa, nan naji tsoro ya kama ni, ina tafiya ina waige waige. Kamar daga sama naji an fincikeni an hada da jikin katanga, na takarkare iyakacin karfi na zan yi ihu aka toshe bakina da hannu. Duhu ne gurin dan haka na kasa ganin fuskar wanda ya rike ni, jikina sai karkarwa yake yi kamar mazari. A hankali na fara nutsuwa sai a lokacin naji kamshin sa. A bangare daya na zuciya ta naji dadi cewa ba barayon mutane bane ko dan yankan kai, a daya bangaren kuma wani tsoron ne ya shige ni, what is he going to do to me? Nan na fara kokarin kwace kaina daga hannunsa amma maimakon ya sake ni sai ya saka duk kannin jiki sa ya matse ni a jikin bango, na saka hannayena duka biyun na tattara karfina ina tura kirjinsa amma ko motsi baiyi ba, kawai sai na saka kuka, na kifa fuskata akan kirjinsa ina ta kuka na, a hankali a sunkuyo fuskarsa dai dai kunnena yace min "why do you say yes?, tunda kinsan ba kya sona mai yasa kika ce min you want to walk the path to the future with me? Why are you playing with me? Do you have any idea what you are doing to me?" Ya jera min tambayoyin da nasan ba zan iya amsa masa su ba, yasa hannu yana kokarin dago fuskata amma fir naki yarda, ya hakura ya rabu dani, ya sake cewa "ni kawai so nake in san me yasa kika amsa min bayan kinsan bakya sona, kina gaya min zan barki kiyi tafiyarki. You don't love me, right?" A hankali na girgiza kaina, ya saka hannayensa biyu ya dago kaina yana kallon cikin ido na yace "look into my eyes and tell me you love me" wasa ma kenan, na dauke ido na daga cikin nasa nace "I can't" "you can't what" "say it" "say what" "the L word" daga kirjinsa naji sound din dariya amma bata fito bakinsa ba. "Then why are you avoiding me" nan ma shiru babu amsa "are you ashamed to be seen with me?" Nayi sauri nace "No" "please just tell me why" sai da na dauki some seconds sannan na fara magana "I am just not ready for this, bana so in bata rayuwa ta, ina so in kara girma, at least in gama sec sch, am sorry ban gaya maka haka ba, i just don't want you to go" ya sake dago fuskata yace "look at me, I will never mess up your life, never. I love you and I will wait for you to be ready, no matter how long, kawai ina so in tabbatar cewa kina sona kema" sai kuma ya danyi dariya kadan "but tunda kin kasa fadar L word a gaba na dole in hakura da gyada kan" kunya ce ta kara kamani na cigaba da kokarin ture shi yana dariya, na hakura na barshi, sai da ya gama dariyarsa sannan ya sake rage murya yace "I missed you, please ki daina min abinda kike min, please ko yaya ne kike bani lokacin ki, I promise I will behave, bazan kuma yi miki maganar L ba, please ki daina share ni, I will loose my mind, ki gaya min duk abinda ba kya so zan daina, I promise" ina jinsa kuma inajin maganar sa har cikin raina, a hankali nace "ka daina tabani, babu kyau" ina rufe bakina ya shika ni yace "done, I will never touch you again" muka yi shiru for sometimes, nace "zan tafi, dare yayi" yace "ok, I will see you tomorrow in class"